The Piss-Madness of King Logan
This show keeps topping itself, huh?
After last week’s harrowing trek through the dunes, we are back in Manhattan for WaystarRoyco’s annual shareholders' meeting. And what a ride it was.
Logan has developed some kind of foot injury, and he has to piss as usual. Faceless workers set up the event space for the meeting, a setting that I, as a former live event worker, had violent flashbacks to. Kendall is on his self-righteousness tip, referring to his team’s hotel suite as a “shadow chamber”. His daughter Sophie wants to give Megathump the bunny a bagel, and he gives the all-clear.
Meanwhile, those still allied with Logan have been feinting off the overtures of Sandy, Sandi, and Stewy. Karl has been up all night, Roman proposes they all get work at the same Target (fun spin-off idea!), and Connor is still angling to get a corporate position at WaystarRoyco. It’s just not the right time. Can someone put Connor away?
No one really seems to know what’s going on, and Logan is awfully quiet. Then, Stewy Hosseini swoops in, dashing as ever in a black turtleneck, to meet with Ken in the “shadow chamber”. They forge yet another tentative alliance, but next thing we know, Stewy is calling Logan, pitching a settlement. Stewy Hosseini, king of betrayal. Logan is lucid, going right into business mode, which is still genuinely impressive. When he’s not telling everyone to fuck off or passing out, his brain is pretty nimble. Or so we think.
Shiv, Gerri, Roman, and Karl make their way up to Sandy’s apartment to check in with him, Sandi, and Stewy and negotiate the terms of the settlement. Sandy is wheelchair-bound and barely verbal, Roman speculates whether the “syphilis rumor” (which may have been started by the Roys) is true, and Sandi is the go-between. The Sandy(ie)s and Stewy require veto on the next CEO, which Shiv and Roman obviously object to. Shiv wonders aloud if Sandi is pulling some strings, which is met curtly with “I just do what my dad tells me. Like you guys.” Which, true. But, of course, Shiv sees red.
Connor corners Logan, who questions his eldest’s sudden interest in leadership. It seems that he was deemed unfit by Logan in the past, but Logan “doesn’t do ancient history”. Kendall and Greg meet up, and it becomes abundantly clear that Ken is about to throw our loveable giant to the dogs at the Department of Justice. He is dismissive of Greg’s feelings of betrayal (“A lot of shit gets said”) and dismisses him. And Greg didn’t even get a watch out of it.
Greg is put in the line of fire once more, meeting with Ewan, “the best darn gramper out”, and Roger Pugh for coffee. After Greg kisses him on the back of the neck, Ewan reveals his deep disappointment in his grandson for firing Pugh as his lawyer, and is giving Greg’s entire inheritance to Greenpeace. In a contrast to every single character on this show, Ewan values his friendship with Pugh, and sees Greg’s businessman move as a betrayal.
Once more, Logan has to piss. He asks Tom to help him to the bathroom (not by name, of course), Karl has to continue to vamp on stage, and all Logan can say is “fuck ‘em”. All of a sudden, he wants Michelle-Anne to get the SEC to shut the investigation down out of nowhere. Something is up regarding dementia and urine. In a shockingly tender moment, Logan is in serious pain in the bathroom stall, and Tom asks if he “g[o]t it caught” in the fly of his pants. He then calls him “son” and Tom’s heart grows three sizes, calling him “pop”.
Tom and Logan come back to the Roy HQ, and Logan, for the second time in the series, calls Shiv by Marcia’s name. Gross! It turns out that Logan has a UTI. When untreated, that can literally drive an elderly person crazy. He needs to call up his ex-wife Caroline for some reason. According to Connor, Reagan had a UTI and “nearly nuked Belgium”, and Logan has not been taking his medication. The concept of “piss madness”, a Seinfeldian turn of phrase, is introduced and the team scrambles. Hugo proposes a bomb threat, Roman a Tabasco suppository, and then the President calls. He wants to speak to an incapacitated Logan, and Connor steps up to the plate. Or tries to, until he is shot down.
Roman, crowned “bootleg Logan”, picks up the phone and immediately folds. He always does. Poor guy. It turns out that the heat that ATN has put on some of the President’s blunders are related to an unspecified neurological condition, and he will not be running for re-election. He would rather be with his family than be scrutinized. Here, I wish life would imitate art. Despite the friction between “the Raisin” and Logan, this is ultimately a loss of access for WaystarRoyco. But Connor’s pumped!
Shiv manages a backroom deal with Sandi, girlboss to girlboss, where they finagle four board seats while keeping one for the Roys. This Hail Mary is satisfactory to all, and a shareholder vote is avoided! If Josh’s sentiments in last week’s episode are any indication, the Roys would be totally fucked.
Tom sees an opportunity, and tells his partner in the “balanced love portfolio” that he is hornt up and ready to go. She’s initially on board, until he lets slip that he’s been tracking her ovulation. Tom seems to think that a baby would keep Shiv occupied while he does his bid, and that “it’s supposed to be nice”. And just when we forgot Terminal Tom has lost his damn mind.
After avoiding speaking publicly for the entire episode, Karl finally takes the stage to announce the settlement, interrupting a video about WaystarRoyco “always car[ing] about women” narrated by Shiv. But then, a wild Kendall appears from the back of the stage and pushes Karl aside to posture and hold a “moment of silence” for the women whose victimhood was covered up by the company. He goes into “say their names” mode and announces a foundation of sorts to address sexual violence. Ken’s social engagement has no moral imperative behind it, it’s all one-upmanship and clout chasing.
The Logan contingent is thrown off (“he’s not even wearing a tie!”) but Karolina advises they let him wear himself out. They cut his mic, but he’s still loud, and eventually peters out.
The event ends, and all celebrate the settlement with a glass of champagne. Connor brags about his presidential chances to Cyd and Hugo (always good to see Cyd!). Greg informs Tom that he’s going to sue Greenpeace to get Ewan’s money back. Tom likes his style. Logan, all rehydrated, is pissed about the board seat losses and is dismissive of Shiv, who likely saved the company from Sandy and the Furnesses, knocking a glass of champagne from her hand and telling her to “stop buzzing” in his ear. He would have “figured it out”. Which Shiv did. But she’s not him, so.
Kendall’s speech is being called “the Sermon on the Marriott”, which he likes, reminding us of his awful taste, when he is called to meet with Logan. He goes up to a suite, where it turns out that, in one last attempt at getting the upper hand, Logan has already left. Kendall calls him, and Logan has Kendall’s number blocked on his phone. And, by the way, the bunny got sick from eating the bagel.
This episode, almost entirely public-facing, was a welcome departure from the private backrooms of most of the season, yet it still made room for typical Succession business talk. The dialogue in this episode was just fantastic, stuffed full of fantastic lines. Written by Veep alum Tony Roche and playwright Susan Soon He Stanton, “Retired Janitors of Idaho” was a testament to the power of plain-old strong writing. The tense rooms, the clock running out, the vivid locations. More playwrights in TV, please.
Last night’s episode also continued to tease out the season 3 themes that intrigue me most, including the company’s long-standing bigotry and dismissal of most women, Kendall’s vacuous embrace of social justice, Roman’s swaggering ineffectualness, and the competing values of friendship and business.
Shiv did what was right for the company, but I am sure that we will see Logan resent her for taking action while he was infirm in upcoming episodes. The man just can’t quit. Even as his “urethra wrested control from his brain”, he still needed to retain power, commanding Greg to get rid of the imaginary cat from under his chair.
Additionally, the parallels between Shiv and Sandi are fascinating. If Logan had been kind (or at least fair) to Shiv, would she have as much choice and power as Sandi?
Finally, the performances and Nicholas Britell’s score this week were just fantastic. Brian Cox played Logan’s delirious fury perfectly, screaming in gibberish, and the ensemble made their confusion and frustration at all of the episode’s events crystal-clear.
What a blessing to have Succession on Sunday nights. See you next week!
