“Alas, Vanity.”
Welcome back to another recap! This week was an absolute doozy, the epic highs and lows of network news. Like a massive hoagie, I couldn’t begin to approach this on my own. So, I throw to one of my favorite writers, Margo Skornia.
Take it away, Margo!
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We’re into the endgame. After weeks of buildup, election night has (finally) arrived, and, oh boy, the chickens have come home to roost. “America Decides” is an episode of consequences, baby!!
Let’s start small: Tom, because he has no idea what he’s doing, has worn dress shoes, even though he’s going to be up and running around all night. Per usual, he’s more concerned with appearance than anything else. At the end of the day, this is the same man who confessed his love of watches and tie bars to Shiv. Because Tom’s so self-obsessed, he blows off Greg when the latter tries to warn him about Shiv and Matsson, which costs him later. Tom also forces Greg to do coke and yells at him about “bodega sushi,” but more to come.
Roman and Kendall are freaking out because Matsson’s chances of winning increase with the close of every state. Kendall, in a totally normal move, has Rava and his kids followed without telling them. Sweet Sophie is terrified because, returning viewers will recall, she was pushed by a Ravenhead viewer a few days previous. Her father tries to comfort her: “I won’t let the world push you,” he tells her, before Ravenhead gets back on the air and spews more vitriol. Leopards? Eating my daughter’s face? It’s more likely than you think.
Shiv, for her part, is lying to everyone, including us. I can’t tell if she wants a Jimenez win because she’s in bed with Matsson or if she’s genuinely afraid of Mencken. Not that there aren’t reasons to fear Mencken. His supporters have set fire to a counting facility in Wisconsin, something ATN doesn’t cover until it’s way too late. (Tom’s too busy panicking about the touchscreens to really care, and, in his words, “Just because something’s on fire doesn’t make it news.”)
Crosstalk ensues. At one point, Shiv is holding two cell phones, one with Tom, the other with Nate. She’s literally caught between the two of them. Tom and Shiv eventually make their way into the same room, and she pulls him aside. 🚨🚨🚨It’s happening, everyone!! 🚨🚨🚨 They’re finally going to talk! Tom accuses Shiv of hating and killing her father, and she retaliates by telling him she’s pregnant with the Tomlette. And what does Tom do? Accuses her of lying! For attention! Which, in fairness, is something she’s done before, but this is a low blow. This is where Shiv starts to lose her grip on things, and her panic is only exacerbated by Roman. This entire time, the youngest Roy has been bouncing around ATN, cawing “false flag” at everything he disagrees with, sporting his little fash haircut, and texting emojis to Mencken. When Shiv starts to get emotional about ATN’s integrity, Roman meets her with callous cynicism. Shiv, apparently desperate for some sort of win, pulls Greg into a side room and…. uh, harasses him. She knows that he knows that she and Matsson are close, and she threatens to eviscerate him (literally) if he mentions anything to the brothers. This is a total Logan move, but Shiv doesn’t carry the clout her father did. She simply isn’t cold enough to carry this move off. (Also, Logan probably would have paid Greg handsomely for his silence, which Shiv refuses to do.) It will come back to bite her in the ass.
We get an incredible wasabi-lemon La Croix sequence. The bodega sushi setup pays off like a dang slot machine. I can’t do it justice. Just watch it if you haven’t. Connor shows up and begs Roman for a position in Mencken’s cabinet; Willa’s afraid of a Mencken victory but sells out so she can accompany Connor to Europe; Connor’s concession speech goes to absolute hell in a handbasket, making me want to say enough already!
Roman shines in this episode, and not in a good way. He knows everyone’s pain points, and he puts his thumb on the bruise. He pushes Tom to call Wisconsin, and then gives Kendall a wacky analogy of their childhood preferences for chicken and steak. He has no horse in this race. As he says, “We’ll be in the West Wing.” He couldn’t care who the president is, so long as the Roys continue to have the Commander in Chief’s personal phone number.
Okay, a lot of things happen in quick succession (ha, ha) after this.
Shiv’s cozied up in a conference room watching PGN, and Kendall wanders in. He’s distraught, and Shiv, more to keep him from calling the race for Mencken than to comfort him, calls him a good guy and a good father. They know each other so well. We get two banger lines in this episode, and Kendall delivers the first here: “Maybe,” he says, in reference to his parenting, “The poison drips through.” AAAAH! AAAAAAAH! (that’s me yelling about Kendall recognizing generational trauma.)
Shiv says she’ll beg the Jimenez campaign (through Nate) to block the Matsson deal, even though she’ll benefit from the deal going through. She steps outside and fakes a call to Nate, but Kendall smells something fishy. He chats up Greg, who’s all too willing to spill the beans on Shivy. Shiv’s overplayed her hand here, and everything falls apart. The brothers turn on her, Tom doesn’t listen to her, and the boys call it for Mencken. Greg delivers the call to the newsroom, a duty he clearly considers personally immoral but professional suicide to disobey, despite Tom hot on his heels attempting to carry out the order himself.
The camerawork here is spectacular, by the way. Our gaze lingers on the women in the room, each of whom is both complicit in Mencken’s win and will suffer at his campaign’s hands. Scrumptious! We then turn to Roman, with his smarmy little ratfaced smirk; to Decision Desk Darwin, who knows he screwed up bad; then to Kenny, who looks like he wants to cry or maybe throw up a little bit.
Then the justifications start. Greg tells himself the Mencken call would have happened anyway, Tom casts about for historical precedence, and Roman assures everyone that “the market’s holding the leash.” This is when we get the second banger line. Siobhan, in response to Roman’s flippant “nothing’s gonna happen,” says “Things do happen, Rome.” Sarah Snook’s face when she delivers this line is worthy of an Emmy in itself. She’s regretful, scorned, and approaching murderous. Great combo! The episode ends with Kendall talking to his driver, for want of anyone else to comfort him. Remind you of anyone?
*Sam Richardson voice* What an ep! Surely this show can’t get more psychosexual and weird, right? What’s that? The funeral’s next week? Mommy’s gonna be in town, Roman’s speaking publicly, and Uncle Ewan’s making an appearance. Normal times! See you there!
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Wow, Margo, that was great. You can check out her Medium here and her website here.
Next week we have another big ol’ family reunion, so naturally something awful is going to happen. Maybe Gerri will finally get a sword.
See you next week!
